there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
