I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
your room smells of hookers.
And success
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
