Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
