Sponge bath it is.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
