Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
