Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
