SEEEEXXX PLEASE
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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