i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Randomize
