just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
