What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
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