Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
this boner is exhausting
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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