no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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