She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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