I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I intend to get homeless drunk
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I think a kid would responsible me up
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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