this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
