She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
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