Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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