Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
