YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
This is the high leading the old right now
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
