I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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