no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
