I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
