I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
