Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
