? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
