My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
