Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
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