i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
