I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
