dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
