The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
