Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
