do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize
