If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Randomize
