I need help removing her.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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