But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Randomize
