remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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