he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
