I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
