Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
How does it feel to date your dad?
I need to align my fucking chakras
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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