How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
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