I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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