it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
