Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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