I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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