I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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