It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Randomize
