it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
