I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Randomize
