sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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